#3 - I’m Losing It with the Kids
How to Regulate When Everything Feels Like Too Much
What You’ll Find in This Module:
✔️ A recording of the teaching portion (no group sharing included)
✔️ A written breakdown of the session so you can revisit the key pieces
✔️ Journal + art prompts to explore in your own time, at your own pace
Why Overstimulation and Mom Rage Happen (and Why They Don’t Make You a Bad Mom)
You love your kids. You would do anything for them.
And yet, there are days when you feel like you’re about to lose your mind.
Maybe it’s the noise - the whining, the endless “mom, mom, mom.”
Maybe it’s the touch - the sticky hands, the climbing, the constant physical presence.
Maybe it’s the mental load - trying to cook dinner while breaking up fights, while answering a text, while also remembering that you forgot to pay that bill.
It’s all too much, and suddenly, you’re snapping, yelling, or shutting down completely.
This is overstimulation. It’s a nervous system response, not a personal failure.
What’s Happening in Your Brain?
When you experience sensory overload, your brain perceives it as a threat - even if it’s just your kids asking for snacks. Your nervous system kicks into fight-or-flight mode:
Fight: You snap, yell, or lash out.
Flight: You feel the urge to leave, hide, or shut down emotionally.
Freeze: You mentally check out, feeling numb or distant.
You are not alone in this. Research shows that:
Mom rage is common - 80% of mothers admit to experiencing moments of anger and frustration that feel out of control.
Overstimulation is heightened in parents with ADHD, anxiety, or past trauma.
Chronic overstimulation leads to burnout and emotional exhaustion, making self-regulation harder over time.
The problem is that we weren’t taught how to regulate our emotions while being responsible for tiny humans who push all our buttons.
This module isn’t about forcing yourself to be “calm” all the time (because, let’s be real, that’s impossible). It’s about understanding your triggers, recognizing when your nervous system is overwhelmed, and finding ways to regulate before you explode.
We are flipping the script from “I’m an angry mom” to “I’m a mom with unmet needs who deserves support.”
🧠 Brain Dump Sentence Stems
When I think about feeling overstimulated,
I think I should...
I think I shouldn't...
I would like to...
I do not want to...
I feel...
I need...
I want...
🧘♀️ Meditation: “The Eye of the Storm”
Close your eyes. Breathe deeply.
Imagine a storm - a powerful, chaotic storm with roaring winds and crashing waves.
This storm is everything you feel when you’re overwhelmed. The noise. The chaos. The endless demands. The weight of responsibility.
But now, shift your focus. Move inward.
At the center of every storm, there is a calm, still place - the eye of the storm. A place where everything is quiet.
Now, imagine yourself standing in the eye of your own storm. The chaos is still there, swirling around you. But you are not the storm. You are the calm in the center of it.
Breathe in - feeling that calm expand within you.
Breathe out - letting go of the tension in your body.
You don’t have to control the storm. You just have to find your center.
Take another deep breath, feeling yourself anchored. Grounded. Capable. Safe.
And when you’re ready, open your eyes.
🎨 Art & Written Journal Prompts
1. Art Prompt: “Eye of the Storm"
Create a visual representation of your calm center within the chaos. Using any materials available:
Draw/paint the swirling emotions and sensations that overwhelm you on the outside
Create a distinct peaceful center representing your grounded self
2. Art Prompt: “Mapping My Overstimulation”
💡 Supplies: Paper, colored pencils, markers, crayons.
Draw a body outline (or trace your hand).
Use colors and shapes to show where you feel overstimulation in your body.
Does your chest feel tight?
Does your head feel like it’s buzzing?
Do your hands clench?
Label what each area holds.
“My shoulders hold the weight of responsibility.”
“My jaw clenches when I hold in my frustration.”
Now, draw something next to your body that represents calm.
Maybe it’s water.
Maybe it’s soft colors.
Maybe it’s an image of yourself resting.
Look at both parts of your drawing - the overwhelm and the calm - and reflect: What helps me shift from one to the other?
2. Written Prompt: “The Version of Me That Feels Calm”
💡 Supplies: Journal or blank paper.
Write about a time when you felt peaceful - even if it was just for a moment.
What were you doing?
What did your body feel like?
What helped you feel that way?
How can you create more of those moments, even in small ways?
3. Written Prompt: “Rewriting My Overwhelm Story”
💡 Supplies: Journal or blank paper.
Write down a recent moment when you lost your patience.
Now, instead of judging yourself, write about it with self-compassion.
What led up to that moment?
What was really happening inside you?
What would you say to a friend who felt this way?
Rewrite the story:
Instead of “I exploded because I’m a bad mom,” try “I had a hard moment because I was overwhelmed. I can learn from this and be kinder to myself next time.”
🔍 Reflection Questions
What strategies help you recognize early signs of sensory overload?
How can you create small moments of peace within chaos?
What's one reframe you'll use next time you feel overwhelmed?
💡 Key Takeaway for This Module:
Your nervous system is not working against you - it’s just overloaded. And you are allowed to find ways to regulate before you hit your breaking point.
🔥 Want to keep going? This week, notice the early signs of overstimulation in your body. When you catch them, PAUSE. Breathe. Step away if you can. Even 10 seconds of grounding can shift everything
COPING TOOL - Let The Problem be the Problem
Self-compassion coping tool for moms who are tired of feeling like the villain in their own story. Inspired by Olivia Scobie
💭 But First, a Soft Reality Check:
If you’ve ever caught yourself thinking, “Maybe I am the problem,” after wiping down the counter, wrangling a tantrum, and hiding in the bathroom with your phone and a stack of parenting experts…
You’re not alone.
When we’re overwhelmed, overstimulated, and emotionally fried, our brains reach for someone to blame. And usually? That finger points to you, your partner, or your kids.
This tool gives you a way out of that spiral.
✨ The Reframe:
Try this: Think of a problem you’re currently having.
It could be the unfair division of labour, your kids’ behaviour, the moving routine, or your partner’s work hours.
Now ask yourself:
“If I’m not the problem… and they’re not the problem… then what is the actual problem?”
This isn’t about ignoring reality—it’s about creating space to see it more clearly.
Because when we let the problem be the problem, we stop making villains out of the people we love (Including ourselves.)
🧠 Why This Works:
When used regularly, this tool shifts your nervous system from:
❌ self-blame ❌ internalized failure ❌ reactive spiraling
To:
✅ clarity ✅ emotional regulation ✅ grounded problem-solving
And it reinforces this truth: You are not the problem.
You are a human inside a broken, demanding system.
And while we can’t always wait for the system to change… we can build tools of resilience that help us live softer inside it.
🖌 The Coping Tool: Let’s Name It
Before we name the problem, let’s explore how it’s showing up for you:
💬 Ask Yourself:
What do I believe about this situation?
What does this “problem” feel like in my body?
If it had a shape, colour, or texture—what would it be?
What’s the story it keeps whispering to me?
Where did that story come from?
✍️ Try These Sentence Starters:
“The story I keep hearing in my head is…”
“If this problem had a voice, it would say…”
“If I believed it wasn’t my fault, I might see that…”
Remember you are not the problem and they are not the problem… Take your time.
You’re allowed to scribble, rant, cry, or sit quietly.
All of it counts.
📄 Then, Name the Problem:
Remember: If I'm not the problem and {they} aren't the problem... What is the actual problem?
Write it down clearly and directly.
Example: I'm I'm not the problem and my partner isn't the problem... The problem to be solved: We are not on the same page about consistent and fair discipline.
Now brainstorm a few possible ways to work toward resolving it—without assuming it’s your job to carry it alone.
🎨 Art Prompt 1: The Problem in the Room
Draw the actual issue that’s been showing up lately in your home or in your head.
Don’t draw people—draw the problem as an object, a monster, a thundercloud, a boulder, a sticky mess.
Label it. Externalize it.
Make it something you can actually look at.
🎨 Art Prompt 2: The Bridge
Now draw a bridge between where you are and where you want to be.
Ask yourself:
What’s under the bridge?
What’s keeping me stuck?
What do I need to get to the other side?
💡 Optional: Take a photo of your art and reflect in your journal or voice notes.
Or share it inside the Motherload group - it might help another mom feel less alone.
✍️ Bonus Journaling Prompt:
“If I let the problem be the problem, I would stop blaming ____, and start addressing ____.”
Let the sentence be a doorway. Walk through it slowly
⏱ Do This if You've Got 10 Minutes or Less:
Only have a few minutes between supper chaos and bedtime? Try this:
Take 3 deep breaths and ask: “What am I carrying that isn’t mine?”
Pick one sentence starter from above and write for 2 minutes - no censoring.
Draw a super quick sketch of the “problem” (stick figures, blobs, scribbles welcome).
Set a 5-minute timer and visualize the problem being resolved / no longer an issue.
So What Do You Do With This Now?
Stop assuming the story ends with you (or them) being the problem. Instead—pause.
You name what’s real.
You let the problem be the problem.
And from that place—not shame, not spiraling, not blame— you create a little space.
This week, I want you to practice this shift at least once.
When a dark or twisty thought starts whispering, “You’re the problem,” I want you to whisper back: “Maybe not. But I wanna find out what is” Then reach for your art. Or your journal. Or just the smallest thread of curiosity.
Because this isn’t about fixing yourself. It’s about freeing yourself.
🌀 And this is only the beginning.
